Some experts warn that if we are constantly having fun with the same type of partner, we lose a lot. Often, we do not even know what we want and what we need, so we need to roll out from the safe zone from time to time, especially if previous attempts have ended us unwittingly. When we forget the “guy”, we can learn something, it will be fun, and even it may even be the perfect person for us. If we really like to keep enjoying ourselves with someone who is our type, we are not losing anything. However, if we stick to that at all costs, although we are not truly happy, we need to ask ourselves why we are doing it.Ellen Starr couples counselling is the experts for relationships. So, in case you are experiencing some problems, do not hesitate to contact us.
Do we lack the courage to try something new? Do we want to maintain an ideal image of ourselves with the help of a partner who is smart enough, beautiful, rich, fun? What does it say about our complexes? Opportunities are countless, but in all cases, we lose the chance to find someone who truly loves us and makes us feel good and with whom we can find a deep, authentic love.
Men can be picky too
Although at first glance it would be said that women are more inclined to give a chance to someone only because they do not fit into their image, it is not so.
Men are more tolerant in this matter. Perhaps women only talk more and “philosophize” because they are on average verbally “stronger” than men, so their voice is heard more when these issues are concerned.
And so, the next time you dump somebody at first glance, saying that he or she not your type and it’s different from the image you have about an ideal partner, think about carefully because perhaps you just found the person of your life in front of you, so it would be a pity to miss it.
Life is full of surprises. The right questions we can ask ourselves when we give a chance to someone are not: “Is he / she my type?” But “How would this person make me feel?”, “What does this relationship do to me?”, “Does it please me and make me happy?” So, we can separate ourselves from the powerful rationalization and feel what the whole being tells us, and not just the brain. The brain is a good servant, but a bad master. Life can easily deny it if we are brave enough. It’s exciting to discover yourself through a relationship with another being. We can easily be surprised to see what can make us happy.
Security or defense mechanism
Short legs, small breasts, narrow shoulders, height, weight, baldness – all these are the reasons why many “write off” potential partners.
Sexual attractiveness, among which is influenced by appearance, is an important component of a successful relationship. We cannot make ourselves physically attractive if we are not. But if someone is too detailed and petty, it’s very likely a defense mechanism.